List Four: An Expert in Limited Television

I watch limited television because Boyfriend and I don't have cable. Long story short: we don't have cable. If you ask me, "Did you see [insert most any TV show here] last night?" my answer will most likely be "No, we don't have cable." You will ask, incredulously, "You don't have CABLE?!" to which I will respond, "Nope" and we will have the exact same conversation the next week because the thought of not having cable in 2011 is too wild for many people to accept and retain.

So while I don't see most shows and passionately miss the ability to watch Food Network and HGTV, I still do watch a bit of TV. I have a few shows that I will make time for and some that I will make sure I catch online because I don't have cable and thus, it's the only way I can see it. Of course, there are always bitches who don't upload episodes of all their shows and I've got to wait until they come on Netflix streaming (looking at you, TLC, because damn it, sometimes I just want to watch Buddy Valastro make some awesome cakes).

Of the few TV shows I do watch, these are my favorites and I highly recommend them. Each is a nugget of entertainment gold, though none of them are like each other.

My favorites:
1. Modern Family
I will schedule my Wednesdays around this. I MUST be home by 9:00 p.m. The writing is spectacular and the acting is flawless. It's so rare that you get such an incredible combination of genius writing and perfection in delivery.

"Come on Manny, I could have unbuttoned your shirt if I wanted to"
"Lily...isn't that going to be hard for her to say?"

2. Archer
Many people don't know about this show. It is hysterical. Brother and I watch it and have to rewind it because we were laughing too hard to hear the next joke, which all come at lightning speed. It's been known to trigger asthma attacks for me. If you're easily offended and/or can't appreciate the humor in a wildly inappropriate situation or line of dialogue, this isn't for you. It's also animated but for the love of God, don't let your children watch this.

"No, Cyril, when they're dead, they're just hookers!"
"I am commandeering this airboat!" (Go to 4:53)

3. Supernatural
Considering I wrote an entire geeked-out entry about loving this show, I think elaboration is unnecessary. Just know that I love it. Looove it.

What happens when one actor doesn't give the other one the signal that it's time to stop playing the drums and begin his lines.
"Pudding!"

4. Mr. Sunshine
It's not getting great reviews, but I find it hilarious. While Matthew Perry is billed as the star, his is not the best character. He's like Chandler with an edge, and while he's really quite funny, he pales in comparison to my two favorite characters: Crystal and Roman. I adore Roman, maybe an unhealthy amount. I want him to be my friend.

"Well I did spend a summer in Europe"
"Where's the Asian kid? I specifically requested an Asian kid"

5. 30 Rock
What is there to say about this show that hasn't been said in the plethora of awards given to the show itself, the writers, Tina Fey, Alec Baldwin, etc.? Even the theme song has won an Emmy.

"Why are you wearing a tux? It's after 6, what am I, a farmer?"

6. It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Charlie Kelly is one of TV's best characters ever imagined. Brother, SIL, Boyfriend, and I may or may not have watched the Road Trip episode 3 times in a row. Also, Brother recently taught his two-year-old that the correct response to "What's the time?" is an emphatic "Diaper time!"

"Does your cat make TOO much noise?"
"I will eat your babies bitch!"

I've also fallen out of love with a major show: Glee. Sure, I still list it on my favorites, but I've been extremely disappointed in the second season and don't make it a priority. I really only see it when I need something to watch on Wednesdays at lunch. The first season was so fun, so edgy, so funNY but this second season appears to be the one where the creators realized their show as HUGE and they wanted to make it deeper. The show that once strove to make me laugh hysterically now wants nothing more than to make me cry. There also seems to be more singing than there once was. Or maybe the songs were just better in the first season.

I feel the need to add that the fact that this list does not end in a multiple of 5 is killing me. I just couldn't leave off one of those six shows and I didn't want to add others that I simply just like to bump it up to 10. But yeah, there's a little voice in the back of my head going, "it's not 'even'" (because "even" to me doesn't just mean the opposite of odd) and I'm, with much difficulty, ignoring her.